copied from caring bridge 30/6/2010

Wednesday, June 30, 2010 10:42 PM, BST
We were admitted today in order for Oliver to have his pre op and to ensure everything was in place so it was an early start (have you ever tried to get three small children up dressed and ready to leave the house before 7am - today we managed it and to get one load of washing done and on the line and another in the machine.) The girls were dropped at my mother in laws and by all accounts have had a great day buying and cooking tea for daddy, picking flowers, playing at the water park and generally destroying Grandmas house with all of there toys.Oliver has also had a really good day, after the excitement of going on the train and doing sticker books all the way he went shopping (and said I looked pretty in some new bits I tried on which was a great confidence boost) and picked out lots of new toys for him and his sisters. On arriving at the hospital he has managed to move half of the play room into his bed and has been crawling up and down the corridors in a Snow White outfit much to the amusement of the staff and I think we have finally mastered the art of drawing circles. We have had a few wobbles due to no one seeming to know what operation he is actually having tomorrow so I am not consenting to anything until I have seen the main surgeon, and a lovey doctor who seemed a little overwhelmed by Olivier's conditions who decided that he was to sick for surgery - he is however the healthiest he has ever been and two other doctors as well as his cardiologist have decided that now is our best shot. From a personal point of view we have never had to send him to theatre being this well.All bloods etc are done and so we are awaiting the results in the morning but as he is asleep in his cot next to me he looks so small and skinny it is apparent just how badly he needs this operation and to get some decent nutrition. When you see Oliver is he obviously skinny, when you see him naked he is pitifully thin but when you see him lying at eye height every rib is visible even through his pyjamas, his port a cath protrudes to the point that the needle is now to long and needs padding and as gravity draws his stomach in he looks really sick, not helped by the oxygen and SATs monitor and his other equipment.I think I have decided that elective surgery is harder than emergency surgery. In an emergency you can get whisked away with tasks and by concentrating on each small task you do not have to think about the fact that soon you will be handing him over and praying that they will take care of him. With an elective surgery everything is planned, there is nothing to take your mind off of the surgery and the risks and so you think about it more and the more you think about it the harder it is going to be to hand him over. It is a dreadful feeling having to put his life completely in someone elses hands and knowing that their just is no other option. Thank you for all your thougts and your prayers Michelle

http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/oliverking